Funny Cyrus and Kai quotes (ages 5 and 3)

Strangers:
Kai (pointing at a bunch of chubby strangers at another table in a restaurant and talking loudly): They aren't fat!


Stranger 2:
Kai (going into the public bathroom with me and seeing a girl taking a selfie): What's she doing?
Me: Taking a picture of herself. It's called a selfie.
Girl: Snap chat.
Kai: Mommy, did you used to work with her?
Me: No, she works here or I don't know, maybe she works somewhere else. I don't know her.
Kai: Do you like her?


Servant:
Cyrus: Mommy! Where's my parfait? You said you'd make me one and it's been a long time!
Me: Cyrus! What have I been doing for the last hour?
Cyrus: Cleaning
Me: Do I look like your slave or servant, or do I look like your Mommy who is doing a lot of things for her family and hasn't gotten a chance to make your parfait yet?
Cyrus: You look like my servant.


Superbowl:
Gabriel: The Superbowl is between two teams, one from Seattle and one from Denver.
Cyrus: Where is Denver?
Gabriel: Um...I can't remember... Wisconsin?
Kai (piping up from the back seat): Colorado!


Brendan:
Cyrus (seeing Brendan walking his foster dog in the neighborhood from the car window): Hey. There's Brendan. I love him. He plays with us and is so fun. Can he be my dad?
Gabriel:  Uuummm...
Cyrus: Well, maybe you could both be our dads.


Apologize:
Gabriel: Kai, apologize to Cyrus!
Kai: OK.
-silence-
Gabriel: Apologize to Cyrus!
Kai (exasperated): OK!
-silence-
Gabriel: Do you know what apologize means?
Kai: No.


Fingers:
Gabriel (teasing Kai): Can I eat your fingers?
Kai: NO!
Gabriel: C'mon, I'm going to eat your fingers.
Kai: No, my fingers are not vegetarian!
Gabriel (speechless)
Cyrus: He's got a point.


Whisper:
Kai: Daddy, every day I tell you I hate you, but I don't mean it.
Gabriel: You don't tell me that every day.
Kai (very quietly): I whisper it.


Woman:
Kai: Mommy, will you always be a girl?
Me: Yes.
Kai: You'll never be a man?
Me: Nope, I'll never have a penis.
Kai: So you'll always be a girl?
Me: Yes, I'll always be a woman.
Kai (hugging me tightly): I love always-womans.


Hugs:
Cyrus: I can't stop hugging Daddy!
Me: Aw, good, honey.
Cyrus: It's like we're married!


Road trip:
Kai (in the backseat on a road trip):  Daddy?  Daddy?
Mommy: Yes?
Kai: I said, "Daddy!"
Gabriel: What, Kai?
Kai: I said, "Mommy!"


Kai questions to Gabriel  (asked while on a road trip):
1. Is eight straight?
2. Do rabbits walk sometimes?
3. Do tornadoes look like pumpkins?


Snow:
Kai: Mommy, on Christmas eve, I'm going to eat some snow--not all the snow-- I'm going to eat some snow and then run back to my adults...you!


Food:
Cyrus (crying very dramatically after not getting a second piece of chocolate): I have the worst parents ever! They never give me any treats, just healthy food!


Syrup:
Kai: I wish the whole world was made of maple syrup and I could lick it.


Dry:
Kai (after leaving the public restroom where he washed his hands): My hands are all dry!
Me: Mine too.
Kai: Good, then let's touch each other.


Job:
Cyrus: Can I have my lollipop now?
Me: No, it's not time for candy.
Cyrus (upset): Hmph...
Me: I'm just doing my job.
Cyrus: That's the worst job ever.  You have the worst job. I hate your job.


Kai about the zoo:
Me: Kai, we're going to the zoo this weekend.  Isn't that exciting?
Kai: Yeah! We're going to see lots of animals...Lions, tigers, lady tigers, ladybugs.


Big heads:
Tita: Get in my belly.  I'm going to eat you up.
Kai: We won't fit in your mouth because our heads are too fat!


Medicine:
Kai (after puking a few times): Mommy, I'm sick.  I need medicine.
Me: No you don't.
Kai: Yes I do.
Me: What kind of medicine do you need?
Kai (Bringing me the Prednisone liquid and syringe from the fridge): This medicine.
Me: Ha ha ha.  That's Prednisone.  That's not for vomiting.  That's for when you breathe like this (demonstrating wheezing) when you have croup.
Kai: I just heard myself doing that!


Harry Potter:
Me (watching Harry Potter with the boys): I want to be a witch or wizard and go to Hogwarts!
Cyrus: Me too.  I want to be Harry Potter.
Kai: Yeah, and I want to be Voldemort!


Harry Potter 2:
Cyrus: Can you guess who is my favorite character in Harry Potter?
Me: Harry Potter?
Cyrus: Incorrect! He who must not be named!


Harry Potter 3:
Gabriel: Cyrus, did you tell Mommy what we read about today?
Cyrus: Ok, so Snape took Harry and Ron to Professor McGonagall's office and Dumbledore came.
Kai: He's the most powerfulest person I've ever seen.
Me: Why did Snape take them to McGonagall's office?
Cyrus: I don't know, so I'm just going to guess. They were making fun of him.


Bugs
Me: Boys, we're in FL. Look around and see how just one state away from GA there are a lot of differences. See how flat it is?
Cyrus: And there aren't hardly any leaves on the ground, just grass
Gabriel: That's a good observation, Cyrus.
Cyrus: I wish I had my bug catching net from Nama's and Baba's. Then I could catch some bugs. Except that I lost the lid.
Me: That would be fun.
Cyrus: Yeah, I could catch bugs, except for ticks because they would crawl out because I lost the lid. Just a reminder.


Um:
Kai: Mommy?
Me: Yes?
Kai: Um... um....um...um
Me: What is it?
Kai: Wait, I'm still saying "um!"


Sneaky:
Gabriel: Boys, don't pick up those paint sticks.
A minute later...
Gabriel: Kai, did you just pick up that stick?
Kai (looking guilty): You didn't see me pick it up.


Nice:
Kai: Daddy, can I have a sticker for being nice to Satin?
Daddy: You know we don't give you stickers when you ask for them.
Kai: Daddy, I'm not asking you for a sticker. I'm TELLING you a sticker.
Daddy: I'm very happy you were nice to Satin, but you can't have a sticker.
Kai: (dramatically walking off) Ugh! I guess I'll go poop!


Kittens:
Gabriel: Kai, do you want to go home soon to see out kitties?
Kai: Yeah. Earl, Satin, and Harley can't have babies.
Gabriel: Why not?
Kai: Because Mommy nerdered them!


Iowa:
Kai: Iowa is not a state.
Me: What?
Kai: Iowa is just nonsense.
Me: No, it's not.  It's a state.
Kai: No, Mommy.  I-O-WA!  It's nonsense.


Captain America:
Cyrus: Mommy, can Captain America's shield block anything except for Voldemort's spells?


Ninjas:
Cyrus: Since cats have really good hearing, can they hear ninjas, even though they are silent?


Iran:
Me: Cyrus, I want to go to Iran to see the county where your baba was born.  Do you want to go?
Cyrus: No.
Me: Why not?
Cyrus: Because they boss you around in Iran!
Me: What?
Cyrus: You told me Baba's brothers bossed him around when he was little, so I don't want to go there.


Planets:
Gabriel: Kai, how many planets have rings?
Kai: Ten!
Gabriel: Well, there are only eight planets.
Kai: And ten of them have rings!


Defense:
Kai (running out of the bathroom): Cyrus was just whipping me with his towel!
Cyrus: No I wasn't!
Gabriel: Cyrus, were you doing that?
Cyrus: I was trying to, but I couldn't!


Smarter:
Cyrus: Mommy is smarter than you, Daddy.
Gabriel: Why do you say that?
Cyrus: Because Mommy remembers more things than you, she does the laundry, she helps us more, and she sleeps less than you.
Gabriel: Is there anything I'm better at than Mommy?
Cyrus: Computers.


Are we there yet?
Kai: Are we in Toccoa yet?
Me: We're in Ila. We're 40 min away from Toccoa.
Kai (one minute later): Are we in Toccoa now?
Me: Kai, it's an hour drive away from Athens. I do this drive every day. It doesn't make sense to ask me one minute after I told you we were in Ila.  It's a long drive. Well, not as long as our drive to FL.
Cyrus (exasperated): It's longer!


Georgia:
Gabriel (a block from our house): I need to stop for gas.
Cyrus: We're still in Georgia, right?

Squirrel:
Cyrus (seeing a squirrel): There's a squirrel. They are the fastest species in the world!
Me: Um, no they aren't. It's the cheetah. They can run as fast as a car on the highway!
Cyrus: So can a squirrel.


Hiding:
Kai (sitting on the toilet): Mommy! Mommy! Try to find me, Mommy!
Me (looking right at him): There you are!
Kai: No, look somewhere else for me.


Cavities:
Kai: There are worms in our mouths that eat holes into our teeth and that's why we brush our teeth. When we brush, we kill the worms and then our teeth are clean and won't eat holes into our teeth.


Rainbow room:
Me: Did you have a good day at school, Kai?
Kai: Yes. I was happy in the Rainbow Room too.
Me: Oh good.
Gabriel: Kai, why do you like Miss C and Miss C? (Kai's after school teachers).
Kai: Because they don't have penises, right?


Hypothesis:
Cyrus (eating oatmeal with raisins): I think the heat of the oatmeal makes the raisins bigger.
Baba: It's the water soaking into raisins making them plumper.
Gabriel: That's an astute observation, Cyrus!
Cyrus: It's a hypothesis!


Middle of the night
Cyrus: Wake up Mommy. I'm all wet.
Me: OK. Let's change your pajamas and bed sheets.
Cyrus: Is it too early or late for me to get into your bed?
Me: Well, Kai is already sleeping in my bed, so there's not enough room.
Cyrus (thinking sleepily for a minute): That blows.


Cheese:
Kai: Can I have cheese?
Me: No, you already ate a cheese stick.
Kai: But I want cheese.
Me; What's in a cheese stick?
Kai: Not cheese!

Icepocalypse 2014

Since Tuesday morning, NE Georgia and SC have been getting a mixture of snow, freezing rain, and sleet falling on us.  Since we are completely incapable of driving in any wintry conditions and we're not equipped with massive amounts of snow plows, we have all stayed home and enjoyed some time together inside.  My job, as a vet, rarely closes if we don't have to, but neither Dr Amy nor I could make the drive from Athens to Toccoa safely.  We're going to attempt to make it in around 12 PM tomorrow, but there is forecast for icy rain until 1 PM Thursday, so it may not be possible.  Plus, no one knows how much the roads will freeze tonight but it's possible we won't be able to get out of our neighborhoods tomorrow either, let alone drive an hour to work.  We shall see.  

Gabriel, meanwhile, has been to work both snow days before.  On Tuesday, he just drove there because the streets were OK (there was snow in Toccoa, though), and today he and Brendan walked there together, since Bren needed to do more writing on his dissertation/proposal.  Before they left, we all walked the Waffle House, which never seems to close, for a warm family breakfast.  We love having him a block away.  The boys and I have had a fabulous time together at home these last two days, reading books, playing games, doing art, watching Harry Potter II, and napping together.  Ah...if only every day were so fun.  (Though, I assume we'd get sick of staying home all the time if we always did it).  They are out of school again tomorrow, so I'll be home with them in the morning while Gabriel works, and then we'll see how the roads are.  

Despite Bren being only a block away from us, his house actually lost power earlier today and he came over for dinner and some computer time after walking back from his school building.  Hopefully, it's back on.  He can always come spend the night with us if he gets too cold.  It took poor Gabriel almost 50 minutes to walk back from the vet school---a walk that normally only takes him 30 minutes--and he was quite exhausted.  

Cross your fingers for quick melting ice and not too crazy work once I get back to try to catch up on all our appointments and surgeries.

-Shirin

Hamming it up with my bubsies.

Silly and excited in the snow.

This was this morning.  The ice/snow is even deeper now.

Gabriel and the boys on the way to Bren's house.

Walking to Waffle House with Uncle Bren.  Kai looks all downtrodden in the foreground because he wanted me to carry him.  I did for a little while and then Brendan took over, because Kai is a heavy boys these days.

All snuggled in for a warm Waffle House breakfast.

Addendum: I am now posting the rest of this from Thursday, since I wrote the above post on Wednesday right as the connection from our internet was dropped due to the snow.  The internet is back and we had even MORE snow overnight and excitement and fun ensued.


When we got up this morning, more snow was drifting down.




Rolling a big snow ball for the snowman's body.




Snowman number 1.




Teaching the bubsies the proper way to make a snowman.




Snowman number 2.




We finally cajoled Gabriel into coming outside.  He brought a treat with him. Sparklers in the snow?




Sparkler nose.




And sparkler horns too.





So funny.




Contemplating the very large snowball in Cyrus' hand.




Throwing snowballs at the boys.



Walking back from another breakfast at Waffle House.  Boy, they are ALWAYS open.  When Gabriel asked Cyrus how he would prevent someone from tracking his foot prints, he replied that he would ride a motorcycle or use "secret wings" to fly over the snow.




I'm still on call to possibly go in to work around 11-12.  I'm not sure that's going to happen, though.  Lord knows the only time I ever drove in the snow (less deep that this), I was sliding all over the road, and that was just for a few blocks.  It would probably take me two hours to drive the 55 miles it normally takes one hour to drive (if I even go there).